Just a Meeting
by VirtualVirus
Summary: Pein calls for asimple meeting. Which dosen't turn out...simple


Now Nagato aka Pein wasa simple like the others lost his parents forced itno orphange than met had a eye-open planned. A leader who wanted peace in the world which had a easy but hard to-do when his main force was not so peaceful with each other.

"Damn it Deidara!Keep your bombs in that pouch of yours."

"But dan-"

_Slam_. "If you two don't shut the fuck up may jashin help me from murdering you assholes!"

"Like you can Hidan,un."

Ten seconds were spared for the ones hanging out in the kitchen making a cup of joe. Like routine Akayuhi the Akatuski's little orphan covered her ears when the silence fell over the base knowing what was to come after it.

"Damn it Deidara you want me to murder your pussy ass! Don't drop your jaw like that. With the way Sasori is always fucking you it makes me really think you have an pussy."

Pein's hand started to shake when he heard an explosive. His poor Konan growled at the jashinist cursing,while Itachi just sat there sipping from his cup like nothing was happening near his room. Which was at high risk of being exploded.

Every morning it began that same way in the base:Sasori's puppet destroyed or Kakuzu finding blood on his money. Both events resulted into a group bickering for the rest of the day.

"What are you two doing in my room!" The 4 heard Kisame screamed. A crash of glass than followed.

"...Itachi is going to kill you two." The 3 looked to Itachi who actually had the most out-putted anger they all ever saw before.

"Meeting at the statue now everyone." Pein yelled before the weasel got the morning fight worst.

10 in the morning in the meeting room.

Our poor leader-sama rubbed the bridge of his pierce nose. Everyone was at least bickering to each other about something, exception of Yu and Konan,one being not there and the other just thinking of her paper technique.

"Everyone can we please?" Pein started.

No one heard him continuing their rants of hate to each other. Deidara casually trying to blow up Itachi's chair grinning at the oynx man. While Hidan continued trying to burn Kakuzu's money with a lighter Pein could of sworn he said no to even buying at the 7/11 in Iwa.

"Everyone if you do not shut the fuck up i will rinnegan your asses to the fucking next dimension!"

Taking him serious Kakuzu hushed his mouth while the others just blinked at their leader. Pein nodded.

"Alright. I asked you guys to come here since lately your bickerings haven been destroying the hideout frequently."

"Probably because that fucking blonde bitch has the needs to create big explosions in need for a little thing."

Sasori and Tobi both snorted at Hidans comment at the same time. Sasori raised a eyebrow at Tobi questionigly.

"Tobi why are you laughing?"

Tobi waved his hand chidding Sasori,"Your not the only one who has seen Deidara."

"You mean the blonde bitch is a whore!" Hidan started laughing like a maniacwith Kisame smiling like the day was a great day. Yet not so much for the blonde.

"No no Tobi shut the fuck up,un!"

Deiadra attempted to throw a bomb at Tobi but Pein flicked a kunai at it for it got to him.

"Away from...needy habits.."insert Hidan,Kisame and Zetsu snickering "Yes Deidara we would like for you to stop blowing shit up in the ...there are other issues at hand in the hideout."

Deidara slammed his hands open the table pointing to Hidan and Kakuzu qucikly. "They ruined Yu's mind! I had her coming into my room saying she had a nightmare but her Tou-san had moanings coming from his room,un!"

"Thats not even a fucking issue 'un'!" Hidan screamed back at him.

"Its a issue if the kid is going into my room in the middle of the night touching on my moonflowers.."

The whole room blanched at Zetsu. Itachi turned slightly to the plant on the left of him picking the right words to ask. "Please tell me you did not... try to eat her.."

Zetsu crossed his arms nodding not even bothering with an attempt to hide.

"While you and Kisame were fucking each others brains out that little child decided to touch my moonflower.."

"Dosen't mean you eat her,un!"

"Probably jealous since he dosen't have his own fuck toy!"

Pein deadpanned to Hidans comment wishing he was not hearing this he decided to ask the question that was bugging his mind.

"So you mean you and Kakuzu fuck each others brains out?"

Kakuzu cleared his throat while taking out replica money counting it slowly while Hidan seemed to be thinking on that question.

"Whats so wrong with fucking each oters brains out? At least I don't scream like Deidara."

"I do not scream!" Deidara blew a cherry at Hidan growling.

Hidan nodded at Deidara with his eyes closed. "So you mean to tell me two nights ago you were not moaning 'Sasori harder nngh yes danna mm danna how are you so big for such a tiny man?' I mean you outscreamed me and Itachi that same night."

Deidara and Itachi blushed a like trying to avoids the rooms look at them even Konan looked quickly over at them.

"Me and Zetsu keep it quiet." Tobi peaced signed at Itachi Deidara and Hidan proving he was more mannly then them.

"Tobi..**your supposed to keep that-**

"So the fucking plant man does have sex but with a lollipop!"

Tobi got up quickly from Deidara's still blushings side to hug Zetsu his head into Zetsu's shoulder he groaned as he was in a need...

"So Leader-san while we are on this topic... Do you and Konan fuck?"

Pein just stared at Kisame like he had two heads then looked to Konan who was finding the cieling awfully interesting.

"Erm...Anyways back to the mee-"

"Don't worry Leader-san you'll get in her pants one of these days..."

Kakuzu snorted loudly whispering to his blue friend. "He probably already did but may have had a tiny issue."

"Oho big attitude to cover the issue!" Kisame joined in laughing only once. Directing his next words to Sasori he whipped his eyes like he was crying.

"Isn't it sad we have the two most girlest of the group and get them to our own leader can't even get a girl to let out one moan!"

The whole table laughed in at Pein. Hidan fell to the floor while Kakuzu threw his money into the air ignoring it.

"What if the issue is her being fucking bigger then him!"

Hidan earned harder laughters even from Itachi while the two leaders of the organizations were banging their heads on the table.

'I don't remember this being the issues of Akatsuki'

* * *

_Poor pein. _


End file.
